by Kathie England

Better Than Before – Day 1

I recently began reading the book Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin. This book tackles the question: How do we change? The answer is by using habits.

Rubin is the first to acknowledge that no one-size-fits-all solution exists for creating habits.

However, she proposes that habits begin with self-knowledge, knowing oneself allows us to become more effective.

The first step in her strategy is to identify how our own nature affects our habits. This perspective led her to this question: How does a person respond to expectations?

She says there are two types of expectations: outer expectations and inner expectations. Her conclusion is that everyone falls into one of four groups: Upholders (they respond readily to both outer and inner expectations), Questioners (they question ALL expectations and will meet an expectation only if they believe it is justified), Obligers (they respond readily to outer expectations but struggle to meet inner expectations), and Rebels (who resist ALL expectations whether outer or inner).

I believe I fit in the category of Upholders. During my reading today she talked about the idea of monitoring what you do and that lead me to make the commitment to blog something about her book every day for the next 30 days to help me develop the blogging habit. Hence the title for today’s blog, Better Than Before – Day 1.

Each day I will share something I’ve learned from this book in my own experiment about commitment, monitoring progress, and self-knowledge.

I also want to link my learning to what I have observed in working with clients diagnosed with ADHD, my specialty. My first observation is that many of my clients fit the category of Obligers and this is where accountability to someone like a coach can help an individual make change.

Stay tuned for Day 2.